Large_Tea
not telling :3
Vatican City State (Holy See)
At the dawn of the new age, after the iron talons of our master broke the backs of the dissident, the heretic and the defiler alike. When the plumed skies land with putresence rained death on the soil and the Hades Fires of our sins scorched the land in rebtribution. Our ancestors, the First Faithful laid prostrate before the warriors of the new god and were made to swear 5 oaths.

The first were the Learned Ones, who swore the Oath of Silver and pledged that the stores of earthly wealth and knowledge would be given firstly to the worship of the Divine Machination.

The second were the Warriors, who in humility being bested by the angels of our Prescient Diety; swore the Oath of Steel. That their strength would serve the will of the God that prevailed over the realms of Man.

The third were of the the fanatics, who in the opening of their eyes swore the oath of gold, that they would speak for generations of the goodness and might of the immortal machine.

The fourth were of the builders, who on bended knees swore the oath of tungsten, pledging that until they drew their final breath they would strive to burn the mortal monuments of the Incarnate Engine, erecting towers into the skies as a show of their undying devotion.

The fifth and final, made holy of the wretched, the heretic, the blasphemer, the sick, the unworthy, they swore lying prostrate the oath of iron, that for their sins against the Iron Master they would toil under the watchful eyes of his chosen. Redemption for them would come from the sacrifice of their blood, their efforts, and their lives in every endeavor the Iron Master lay before them.

And ye, numerous as you are, stand among their number.

O congregation, those before me stand in contempt at the sight of the Iron Master. Let the immortal machine proclaim in bronze voice of energy and power!

"For the weak, I shall in the wine press, and the fallow shall be broken like bread and eaten up, for if only the son of man casts down their idols of hubris and decadence, can they be made, through us, like us."

Congregation, sinners as you were, take heed of the endless wisdom of your new master, for the fair hand caresses and crushes equally. That the leg of the ewe is broken not of hatred but of discipline, so that your rebellious spirit too may be broken and remain a disciple. Bow and pray, in duty and supplication always, so that if you truly seek redemption that you shall be made anew.
At the dawn of the new age, after the iron talons of our master broke the backs of the dissident, the heretic and the defiler alike. When the plumed skies land with putresence rained death on the soil and the Hades Fires of our sins scorched the land in rebtribution. Our ancestors, the First Faithful laid prostrate before the warriors of the new god and were made to swear 5 oaths.

The first were the Learned Ones, who swore the Oath of Silver and pledged that the stores of earthly wealth and knowledge would be given firstly to the worship of the Divine Machination.

The second were the Warriors, who in humility being bested by the angels of our Prescient Diety; swore the Oath of Steel. That their strength would serve the will of the God that prevailed over the realms of Man.

The third were of the the fanatics, who in the opening of their eyes swore the oath of gold, that they would speak for generations of the goodness and might of the immortal machine.

The fourth were of the builders, who on bended knees swore the oath of tungsten, pledging that until they drew their final breath they would strive to burn the mortal monuments of the Incarnate Engine, erecting towers into the skies as a show of their undying devotion.

The fifth and final, made holy of the wretched, the heretic, the blasphemer, the sick, the unworthy, they swore lying prostrate the oath of iron, that for their sins against the Iron Master they would toil under the watchful eyes of his chosen. Redemption for them would come from the sacrifice of their blood, their efforts, and their lives in every endeavor the Iron Master lay before them.

And ye, numerous as you are, stand among their number.

O congregation, those before me stand in contempt at the sight of the Iron Master. Let the immortal machine proclaim in bronze voice of energy and power!

"For the weak, I shall in the wine press, and the fallow shall be broken like bread and eaten up, for if only the son of man casts down their idols of hubris and decadence, can they be made, through us, like us."

Congregation, sinners as you were, take heed of the endless wisdom of your new master, for the fair hand caresses and crushes equally. That the leg of the ewe is broken not of hatred but of discipline, so that your rebellious spirit too may be broken and remain a disciple. Bow and pray, in duty and supplication always, so that if you truly seek redemption that you shall be made anew.
aboutme.txt
user@steamclient:~$ nano /home/users/steamcommunity/large_tea/aboutme.txt

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GNU NANO 2.0.9            File: /home/users/steamcommunity/large_tea/aboutme.txt
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Welcome to my profile

Don't bother attempting a trade scam, dozens have tried the same thing you are about to do and you will just end up getting reported lmao

If you know, you know. Don't talk about it here, normies can see :3

PFP by @PlatinMoralle


About me:

Bio: 26y/o Strayan Shidboster (she/her uwu) working in Cybersecurity SOC, likes weebshit, hates the news, just wants to play games and grill
Favourite Music Genres: EDM, Rock, Otacore, Game OSTs (lmao), Techno
Favourtite Arists: Sabaton, Starset, REOL, Cepheid, GHOST DATA, DM DOKURO, 暁Records, Mili
Profession: Cybersecurity Officer
Favourite Game Genres: MMO, Sandbox, PvP, FPS, Sci-Fi, Adventure RPG
Favourite shows/moves: Weebshit lmao


PC Specs:

OS: Windows 11 w/ StartAllBack Cause Windows 11 UX is dogsh*t lmao
CPU: AMD Ryzen 5 7600X
RAM: 32GB DDR5 ADATA XPG Lancer
Mobo: MSI PRO B650-P
Graphics: Yeston RTX 3070
Headset: Razer Nari
Mic: Razer Seiren V2 X
Mouse: Razer Naga X
Keyboard: Wooting Two HE
Monitor: ASUS TUF VG27WQ3B + Dell U2722DE


Favourite Games (In no particular order)

Starsector
Pavlov VR
VRChat
Arma 3
Stellaris
Beat Saber
War Thunder
Terraria (Calamity Mod)
Azur Lane
EVE Online
Girls Frontline (2>1 fite me)

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Screenshot Showcase
Amarr loyalists opening fire on a Drifter battleship during the Drifter Armada in Safizon -Circa YC118
3
Favorite Game
1,665
Hours played
Favorite Group
Currajong Street Gaming - Public Group
Currajong Street Gaming
12
Members
0
In-Game
5
Online
0
In Chat
Review Showcase
524 Hours played
Originally posted by Me:
Since people are asking despite the fact that I haven't touched this game for years, I have reluctantly revisited this review to update purely because people are adding me to ask questions about it, particually about the mod bias on the official forums. Since posting this review i've moved on entirely from StarMade, im too employed to care about a dead game from over a decade ago.

I'm updating this one final time and washing my hands of this disaster of a game for good. Its been 7 years since I posted this review, its time to let sleeping dogs die. Further attempts to contact me about my experiences with StarMade will be ignored.

For those wondering. I was able to refund the game after 500 hours played because I told Steam that the trailer for this game violated Australian Law on deceptive advertising (the trailer had sounds and such not present in the actual game) and Steam agreed. Steam can still refund you even after 2 hours played.

Given the the last meaningful content update to this game was in 2018, Schine have gone on record admitting they are insolvent[i.imgur.com] and they have been forced to open source the game to accept unpaid contributions from the 9 remaining players because they can't afford developers, I don't anticipate I will need to revisit this review.

As I said later in my review, StarMade is not a "no mans sky" success story where a bad game eventually becomes good. It is bad, it has always been bad and it will stay bad.

Play Avorion instead.

"Starmade has become the exact thing that early access is infamous for. Good luck marketing your game 1-2 years down the line when it has a 6 year reputation of being a buggy broken mess.

Go play Avorion, take a look at how those build tools feel. Go spend a few hours in Empyrion, see how the survival mechanics work. Go play Starpoint Gemini Warlords, see how well fleet mechanics work. There is no defending StarMade when you compare it to games that work."

-Comr4de, 2017
StarMade veteran and former member of Schine's Player Council, the CIR

StarMade was another early 2010s attempt at "Minecraft but in space" which was sold to consumers like myself as being a game with limitless possibilities for playing and the potential to grow into something that revolutionises the genre if we only gave Schema and Schine a chance. A chance was given and as we approach 10 years after its release on Steam and 15 years since development started, StarMade today has zero content, zero gameplay, remains an unoptimised, buggy and laggy mess while its developers are out of touch with the community have completely abandoned development of it.

Almost 15 years is a lot, a lot of beloved games both indie and AAA have been made in much less time. So what has 15 years of development given us? Nothing, absolutely nothing. Schine spent all these years adding half-complete "features" on a whim and filling the game with and yandere-dev tier code before moving on and never touching the feature again, building up years worth of cruft in the process making the game preform worse as time goes on.

StarMade remains in an early alpha, feature barren state and is plagued with game breaking bugs, exploits, easily methods of cheating and very poor optimisation in addition to a complete lack of gameplay. After 15 years, StarMade could barely be considered a tech-demo with how little there is to do in it. Filled with features that look and feel like were made on a whim, soup of the day style only to be thrown in haphazardly and never touched again.

Examples of the many bugs this game has include chunk errors capable of destroying hours, server wide crashes by landing on planets or attempting to mine them, poorly optimised weapon mechanics (missiles will often go out of their way to avoid their target), balance issues that affect every aspect of gameplay and the games extreme vulnerability to cheating with something as simple as clientside hacks with cheat engine!

For content, there is nothing. You have your character, some surface level resource gathering, basic voxel spaceship building tools and an empty, barren, content-less universe with nothing to explore or do. There are so few things you can find in this universe that you can count all the different, unique things in this "endless" universe with your fingers AND they are all effectively backdrops with no meaningful gameplay associated with them.

In addition the devs are just downright terrible and egotistical. A particular instance that caused me and a vast majority of what was left of the tiny (less than 20 player) community that remained was an incident that occurred after the release of the "Power 2.0" update, an update that nobody wanted, that wiped away years of player creations and effectively required all players to re-learn the mechanics of the tutorial-less shipbuilding system from scratch.

In the community discourse around this update, several veteran players, myself included, fell victim to a series of censorship campaigns and biased moderation conducted by StarMade's official forum and its moderators, including DukeofRealms, one of the games developers and effectively 2nd in command at Schine. It first became obvious when double standards of moderation were observed for players who were opposed and in flavor of the update and eventually the moderation staff adopted gestapo-like tactics to censor criticism including banning any user who expressed any criticism of the game and its devs.

I personally have been banned from the official forums, StarMade's steam forums and the official Reddit for the horrible crime of criticising StarMade and hurting the fragile ego of its developers.

This anti-criticism campaign was confirmed by (now former) Forum Adminstrator Crusade and Forum Moderator Thingie, who became fed up with how DukeOfRealms was ordering his staff to handle criticism that they walked out from their position in protest. Thingie made a quickly deleted expose which publicly testified that moderators were acting out of bias against veteran players alongside revealing other unethical behaviour that was going on behind the scenes, an archived version of the post in question prior to its hasty deletion by the remaining forum staff can be found here.[archive.fo]

Comr4de, one of these veterans and a former member of StarMade's Council of Intergalactic Representatives (a now defunct group of elected community representatives who had direct communication with Schine) had written up an excellent post that summarised how most of those who were censored was feeling about the game at the time, you can find said post here.[starmadedock.net]

In the years following the resulting exodus of player, development has basically stopped and Schine has since gone on record in their discord server admitting that they do not have the funds to continue content development.[i.imgur.com] The last meaningful content update released for StarMade was in 2018. So if you are someone who buys early access games in the hope that they eventually come good, stay away.

StarMade is not a "No Mans Sky" comeback story, its bad and it will stay bad forever.

This game had a lot of potential to be great, the concepts and ideas presented would have been revolutionary but ultimately this game has succumbed to scope creep, dev incompetence and Schine burning what little good will it had with its players.

We are no longer in the early 2010s and other games like StarMade that have more competent developers, larger communities and more content are out there and exist. I suggest you look into Avorion instead. Its a better version of StarMade. Buy it, not this junk game.

In short, I do not recommend this game to anyone, even for free.
Large_Tea 29 Aug, 2025 @ 8:58pm 
NUH UH

(HI LULU! <3)
Hero_Of_Kvatch577 29 Aug, 2025 @ 7:03pm 
(Comment made with love; Hi T!)
Hero_Of_Kvatch577 29 Aug, 2025 @ 7:01pm 
Certified G00ner (Notarized by me) and overall flat footed individual. I OWN them.
Large_Tea 8 Jul, 2024 @ 10:18pm 
nice ass uwu
Pernils de Grok 4 Jul, 2024 @ 2:26am 
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Gaben Claus 1 Mar, 2024 @ 6:52pm 
+rep killed me in helldivers but made it up later ;)