I am, technically, not a human being. Rather, I am the end result of a genetic experiment gone horribly wrong. I was originally slated to be a fortified, seedless tomato plant, but after a long, twisted series of events involving multiple governmental agencies, Monsanto, the Chinese military, and a group of impassioned, starry-eyed animal rights activists, I am now a sentient tomato plant, hard-wired into the world wide web for reasons I am not at liberty to divulge. When I am not busy completing my primary objective, I enjoy playing simulation games, in particular, "Train Simulator". I'm also into sunshine, clean water and dark soil.