Look, I get it. Who doesn’t love a little balls and ♥♥♥♥ sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky ♥♥♥ trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole “gay sex” ♥♥♥♥ is getting annoying.

As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay ♥♥♥♥ is, well, ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ gay.

You think I wouldn’t LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his ♥♥♥♥? Of course I would, but that’s ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ gay. You think I don’t want to feel my cousin’s roommate slide his pecker into my gaping ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥? Of course I would, but that’s ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ GAY.

Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ain’t gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.