-rep friends WITH NIFFI NOOB

USCH FY BLÄ!!!. Denna mannen kastade fiskmås skit på mig efter att jag klämde på hans pattar utanför Ölkompaniet Redbergsplatsen Göteborg! Akta er för honom han kommer för era barn också!!

I like to creep around my home and act like a goblin I don’t know why but I just enjoy doing this. Maybe it’s my way of dealing with stress or something but I just do it about once every week. Generally I’ll carry around a sack and creep around in a sort of crouch-walking position making goblin noises, then I’ll walk around my house and pick up various different “trinkets” and put them in my bag while saying stuff like “I’ll be having that” and laughing maniacally in my goblin voice (“trinkets” can include anything from ♥♥♥♥ I find on the ground to cutlery or other utensils). The other day I was talking with my neighbours and they mentioned hearing weird noises like what I wrote about and I was just internally screaming the entire conversation. I’m 99% sure they don’t know it’s me but god that 1% chance is seriously weighing on my mind.

The other day, my son came home for Christmas with his new partner. I was excited to meet her, but imagine my horror when it turned out to be another man. I immediately started to protest, but my son said "Dad, this is who I am" Without missing a beat, I turned around and said, "You forgot to say NO H0M0" But my boy simply scoffed at me and said, "Actually dad, I AM a homosexual" I stared straight at my son, penetrating his soul with my eyes, and said, "But that's gay." As soon as I said that, my son began to convulse. He dropped to floor in some sort of manic state, spit pouring from his mouth as his eyes rolled back into his head. His bf tried to help him, but I pushed that dainty little queer away with my heteronormative strength. After a full minute, my son opened his eyes and said, "Dad, you cured me of my homosexuality." Then he pointed at that queer and said, "Let's get that hom0!" After we wiped Brian's blood off our hands, we sat down with a beer and watched some football.

after a long day of school, this man gets home, takes off his socks, jumps on his bed and reads poetry all night long. dont trust him he will read shakespear to you at 3am!!!!!!!!!

+rep good player