As a man with both a large penis and an insatiable thirst for discussion and critical thought regarding the fundamental nature of the world, I feel left out from mainstream philosophy. As you can probably tell by my name, philosophy is my passion, hugely so. However, I cannot help but feel dickscriminated whenever I read the work of the Greek “greats” considering the stigma surrounding hung gentlemen, such as myself, in Ancient Greece. It also has been brought to my attention, through hours of tedious skimming and browsing many archives and libraries, that philosophers, at least the popular, documented ones, are average or even small genitally.

I want to change this.

I want less of the modest-membered, “intellectual” elite to judge me every time I enter an academic event in sweats, or to consider me a lesser man for my size. I’m sure many on here feel the same. It is thought by many, specifically in academic communities, that one cannot have both a sizeable ♥♥♥♥ and a middling to high brain capacity and capability for philosophical processing. In history, did the hung man not gasp at the words of Socrates, did his skin not ripple with goosebumps as he read from the tome of Russel’s brain? This phallic fascism must see an end before it’s too late. I can only imagine the huge number of genius thinkers who have been denied their voice through history due to their measurements below the belt and we, the hung, philosophical minority, must be appeased in the present day for the injustice towards our kind in the past.