Recent reviews by RPColtrane

The kids love this game. They ask to play this, and minecraft, all the time.. something about blocks I guess, maybe they're not well rounded enough..?

I cried tears of joy~

Get this for the story and the tunes, not for the gameplay. While it is fun for a sec, it quickly gets stale. If you've played it, then you might enjoy the nostalgia. If you haven't played it, I suggest mashing through to get the story and move on. I spent much of my time cruising the sights and enjoying the metal!
Praise Ormagöden~

My 4yr old daughter says: "This is BORING!"

If Wall-e had legs and was red he would be B.U.D., a clumsy free-climbing champion!

Then, following his prime directive, he would create a massive planetary grow-op for fun and profit. Sadly, I haven’t found the profit in it yet. Then again, how ever you utilize your ‘star plants’, be it therapy or recreation, cultivating them for maximum yield has quickly proven a therapeutic recreation. It would seem the sky is the limit, and I look forward to getting as high as possible.

I have barely tilled the soil, but I find myself growing rather fond of this plot. Navigating the world is a bumbling, stumbling adventure. Hunting power-up crystals is reminiscent of pillaging the elusive Nirnroot. And riding new shoots feels as magical and acceptable as an unexpected, though surprisingly validating erection.

Who wouldn’t want to come back? Aim for the stars, and share a B.U.D. with a friend.

Feel like shooting cops in the face?

Do it for Money in: PAYDAY 2~

Diary of a Soiled Man:

"Well, the reviews say this is scary but it doesn't look bad..
Huh-Huh 'Cry of Fear', I wonder if I will findout what a real cry of fear sounds like..
Installs and loads up ok, select difficulty... Uh, Medium, I guess..
Cool cinematic intro, this might be fun. Boring train ride and car crash intrigue. Noice..
Ok, now I got this. No gun but this camera might do the trick..
Taking pictures now, learning the game, nothing to worry about..
Click. Click. Pictures are good. Click. ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥!!
[spins in circles pressing esc three times] All done here..
Good thing I chose Medium difficulty.
Unfortunately, not only do I know what a cry of fear truely sounds like,
I now also know what a cry of fear feels like: ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥, apparently..
Also, a cry of fear tends to smell a bit like poo~"

Nope

Excellence in arcading
Story: blunt and alluring
Music: brooding and carnal
Gameplay: frenetic and pitiless
You will fall in love with this game or press R trying~