Recent reviews by GrumpyBatman

what every mobile game wants to be

To those who believe it to be okay to play the Iron Fist simply because it is apart of your missions, know I've been at the mercy of men just following orders. Never again.

After finishing the game I feel I can finally say: these reviewers are ridiculous. Look there is some absolutely solid criticism of this game, but it pales in comparison to the amazing story, beautiful world, and genuinely fun game play. Going off the biggest criticisms I've seen:

The game is too "woke"- if this is your genuine criticism when playing a DRAGON AGE game you are either new to the series and stupid, or just plain stupid. Yes this game has queer people, yes there's even a couple in your party, you're literally in a world with dragons and magic and this is what breaks your immersion? Grow up.

The story is too sanitized and the writing is too "marvel quippy"- The first part is a completely valid critique, the game definitely should have further delved further into the more hard hitting lore especially in regards to the shadow dragons and tevintar. The 'quippiness' I feel is one of those situations of locking in when it needs to. Yes there are moments that are serious and none of the characters take it that way, but there are some heart wrenching moments as well that take the story very seriously.

Oversimplification of combat and equipment as well as making the companions not controllable- Again, a completely valid critique. If you got into dragon age for its gameplay I could totally see how having it simplified like it was could be upsetting, but I found the combat to be genuinely so much fun (I played as a mage and it was the most powerful i've felt as a mage in almost any game) and the equipment changes were super interesting in the aspect of letting your equipment grow along with you.

The past games having little impact as well as "static" ex companions (ie. Morrigan, Dorian, and Varric) - Again, a valid criticism there should have been a greater emphasis on past decisions mattering but in regards to the companions coming back as well as the inquisitor them-self: I feel their plainness is almost a good thing? Like they had their game, they had their time, Morrigan has been brought back every game just to basically be like "hey guys remember her?" but this is a NEW game with a NEW story inside of the same worldspace, let those past companions rest. I enjoyed the moments when Varric (Varric did not feel static and his place in the story makes sense) or Harding talked about the companions but actually seeing them and having them in the game has always been just fanservice to make you wojak at the screen like "omg its them!!" Honestly I loved the whole Solas thing because it was set up well but I would even say too direct a connection to the previous games inherently means that your impact on those games can never be great and should be avoided in general in series like these.

Anyways those are my thoughts that nobody asked for, the game was great I would give it a 9/10 (pinch of salt this with my current recency bias) really pretty, really great story, really fun, easily worth getting and I will be replaying :)

bro i gotta glaze this game, while the ui is amazingly set up and the the game is well balanced with a lot of content blah blah, what i want to talk about is the glossary section because its next level. pretty much every game has some form of tutorial or whatever to explain the big things you need to know but this games glossary is so fantastic including all the contents of the games items, monsters, etc. but also includes tutorials and just a ton of information that is so helpful to know. ive never had a game with so much content that at no point have i had to google something because if i have a question i can literally just check there. amazing game i will continue to play this a bunch :)

so like,., what was the point of playing this.

POP BUGS AND SPILL OIL!!!! HOORAH!

balls gay 3 /pos

10/10

i would rather pay 60$ one time to than 15$ every 3 months or whatever and not even being allowed to get the good stuff without paying more on top of that.

the level of bad a game has to take the limited time i have on this earth to write a negative review should speak volumes about how bad it is. there are like less than 5 whole gameplay aspects and somehow all of them are broken. the tutorial randomly resets, the dialogue is near incomprehensible and even though its only in written form, the animations kept glitching, there seems to be a broken achievement, and above all the game expects you to spend around 8 hours in-game in order to get one of the achievements legitimately. Its not even afkable either because staying in the house until the end of the day is one of the endings so you get sent to main menu. I got this game for free in a bundle of games and I still feel I was ripped off.

trash game, not fun, also makes racist stereotypes calling africa "watermelon land". literally removing from my account not worth the timei spent on it